Earlier this week, I wrote about some of the fascinating experiences I've had during my ABM training. Tonight, I'm sitting in front of the computer, and I feel like I'm at a loss for words. It's not that I am uninspired. It is because my brain is working. Never in my life have I been so saturated with learning.
Ask a small child how he just figured out how to do something new, like skipping, which, by the way, is an incredibly sophisticated action. We trainees are not skipping. One of today's transformational movement lessons involved laying down and placing our head in our hands while feeling our pelvises move. It is a much simpler action than skipping, but after doing it slowly, and with attention, I feel spent. I feel like I have run a marathon or spent a day at the beach.
Just that one lesson left me exerted and in awe, and that was just one! On top of the profound (and I don't use that word lightly) movement lessons, and a one-on-one functional synthesis with Deb, a wonderful practitioner at the training, I feel like I have jumped into a new person. Imagine doing that. It is overwhelming...in a fantastic way! It is a more functional and more aware person, but still me.
And this person is taking in all the wisdom that Anat has to share. My brain is in overdrive. Last night I watched a DVD of one of the week's earlier lessons, because I knew that Anat is conveying more than what I was picking up with my ears. It wore me out! I almost overslept this morning.
This person, me, in the process of transformation, is also beginning to know others going through the same transformation. I am truly blessed to know them, and to share this experience with them. Other parents of special needs children are getting many opportunities to feel what their children do during functional synthesis. Having the chance to talk about it with them is a privilege. The people who have come for personal or professional reasons are amazing too, because they get it. They know there is something more than just tugging and pulling to get a desired effect in relation to healing or improving their lives or the lives of others. The world needs more people like this.
Being in this environment gives me hope. Being around other parents who have been told of all the doom and gloom ahead, yet continue to search, and being around all the individuals who have witnessed in their own lives that the norm was just not cutting it makes me excited because this stuff is real. It works.
Six days of all this intensity has put me in an entirely new state of mind. I can't express it in a blog entry. I can only write about what I observe and feel. And that would take volumes.
Anat was telling us a story about a plane trip, where she stocked up on magazines and chocolate, ready to veg out. And her mentor, Moshe Feldenkrais, tells her, "You cannot reverse the process of awareness." That is one of the most reassuring things I have ever heard. For myself, it means I won't "unlearn" all of this. For David, it means he can only keep doing new things and making changes.
So, I may be tired, and moving around in a bumbling person that is reorganizing itself, but I am truly changed by what I am experiencing. My whole existence is reshaping itself. I'm not sure what the implications are, but I sure as hell can't wait to share it when I get back home!